Some real brain food:

And by 'food' I mean haemorrhage. Anyway, y'all better get yoself a part bake roll.

The first thing y'all gadda do is to take dat part bake roll and split it down the middle, like I split yo mama's legs - ALL THE WAY!

Then y'all gatta put those two pieces under something real hat, I used yo mama's ass but y'all can use a grayill. Get dem honeyz niiice 'n' toasted.

Then y'all better get yo black asses some cheese on it cos dat's da foundation, man, y'all wouldn't build no house widout dem bricks on er bottom.

Now grill that mutha fucker 'til she's niiice runny, like. Not too runny, we don' want dat bitch sliiidin' owff the toast now, do we?

Next, y'all better get yo asses down to Germany cos y'all gonna need some SALAMI, and lots of it. Layer that mutha up good an' proper.

Now ya gatta get the juices followin', tease that girl, make her wan' it...then put her ass back in the grill.

When she's all ready for yo meat, y'all better rise to the occasion an' put some sweet-ass ham on there.

Last but not least, you muthaz better put some cheese slices on er top.

Now she's got one hat body, real niiice, but she still ain't quite ready. Fire up that grill one more time and melt that cheese aaaaaaaaaaaaaall over her ass, she'll love it.

Now she's ready. This is where you real men come in. Y'all need to go down on that ho and eat the soft, juicy, warm, moist girl like she the only one in the world.

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Still a better love story than Twilight.

Integration

Excuse the length of this post...and the grammatical, mathematical and logical errors, and try to see deeper into the depths of the etern...here's the post.

Again, sorry about the length. If you spot any (serious) errors please leave a comment and I'll try to correct it/them. Also post comments and questions about the maths and/or LaTeX used.

Sagging...just no

If one man talks to an invisible man in the sky, he's crazy. If a million do it, it's a religion. Sadly, this can also be said for a number of other things:

One guy getting drunk is a waster, hundreds getting hammered is 'nightlife'.

One girl dressing like a slapper is a slapper, thousands doing it is a fashion.

But I think one thing we can all agree on is that one teenage male wearing his trousers round his arse is an idiot, all of them doing it...yep, they're all fucking morons. Like I've said before, it's not my place to say and you can do what you want...but for fuck sake. Whoever decided that looking like you've either lost about 6 stone and not bought new clothes, or you can't actually read the size numbers on clothes was a good look should be hit with a car. Obviously neither of these are the actual reason people do it, the real reason is because that is what has become 'cool'.

There is a theory (validity TBC) that this 'style' is what people in US prisons do, more importantly what gay people in US prisons do. Now, I'm not against homosexuality (I am against camp-ness, but that's another rant), but I pretty sure that imitating gay prisoners isn't what everyone or even anyone would call cool.

I think that it, amongst other things such as walking with a 'swag', hanging on street corners and talking incoherently, is a way of appearing tougher to one's peers. I don't mean to be impertinent to their dress ritual but how does showing your underwear show that you could beat anyone in close range combat.

Maybe it's to attract the opposite sex, because I'm pretty sure that the ladies show 'the goods' for that reason too, except that's ridiculous because not even a sex crazed woman would be enticed by something as ridiculous as a 'sagging' teenager.

It could be, God forbid, a way for them to 'express themselves'...fuck off.

It's actually quite an ironic thing this trouser malarkey, because it only seems to be teenagers who would be more likely (no offence) to rob a post office maybe, or stab someone, and I don't think that the trousers would be of any particular help when running away from the police.

Maybe it's the same irony as the chinos - try look cool, end up looking like a dickhead.

Gameshow probability puzzle

I read about this a few years ago, but it's only now I thought to write up a nice and neat answer.

Please comment any questions about the maths or LaTeX used.

FOLLOW ME!

If you'd like to see more maths and over-expressed opinions, follow me! I'll be more inclined to keep this thing going.

Proof MLE for variance is biased

The variance of a population is calculated by using:

It seems logical that this formula would also provide a good estimate of the variance of the population when only given a sample. This is what is called and 'estimator'. However, this cannot be used to estimate the population variance based on a sample from it, i.e. it is biased. A proof of this follows along with the alternative, unbiased estimator of the variance of the population.

Please excuse the poor quality.

I can understand if some of this proof is not clear, if you have any queries I can do my best to explain, please leave a comment.

Injury is now a job too

'I was installing a fire alarm and I was give the wrong type of ladder'. So the ladder slipped, I broke my fingers, and now I should have money for my incompetence. These fucking lawyers need to stop encouraging idiocracy. I thought the whole idea of money was that you earned it using your skill and labour, and used that to buy stuff, so how on earth can someone expect money from falling over? Did you injure yourself using equipment at work? Then let that be a lesson to you that you should do your fucking job and check the equipment first.

As far as I can tell these 'lawyers' steal money from other people to give to clumsy people. I live in the UK where we have the NHS, i.e. free health care, so if you get injured they fix you up for nothing, no money out of your pocket for being at a hospital. Also the lawyers help you claim up to 5 years after the accident happened, so even if you've recovered and are back working, you can still rob people. I'm not claiming to have been round the block a few times, but I have one little fact about life: it isn't fair.

If you don't know your own job well enough to know what ladder to use, should your employers have their reputation damaged and profit margins dented? If you're playing golf and lighting strikes the club, should you sue the manufacturers because they're made of metal? If you slip on ice on the street because you weren't watching where you were going, should every tax-payer give you money for the 'trauma' the street caused you? Damn right you shouldn't. I can understand that if you're on a plane and it crashes, you should have your damages paid for (and maybe your money back...and some free flights), or if you buy a laptop and it explodes when you take it out of the box then you should have a free (working) laptop. But if you're just an idiot, I hope you've learnt your lesson.